Monday, May 15, 2006

Carole James Tries (Poorly) To Put Positive Spin On Poll

Mustel Group's latest poll results show that "Support for BC Liberals [is] Strong" - in fact stronger than a year ago when the BC Liberals formed Government.
"I certainly enjoy a good poll," our political annalist, Shawn Manhole declared, "And this poll is a solid indication that the firm, rigid forward thrusting movements of the BC Liberals will take us all to great heights! Giddy up!"
Any-who...the poll shows that support for the BC Liberals is at 54% - 8 points higher than a year ago; while the NDP would somehow earn 37% - down 5 points from last election - with the Green Party taking 5% and all other parties stealing away 4%.
But how has Carole James and the NDP received this news? Well, in a shocking photo forwarded to this hot little Poly which was described by Manhole as "shocking, disturbing yet strangely arousing", ol' CJ has taken to the clubs to get her message out.
"Look, Carole will not go down easily," a frustrated Dipper staffer assured us. "Her plan is to show the world that she has the skills to get her members, er numbers, up."
How about focusing on the needs of British Columbians instead of pandering to the will of unions?
"Get real," our source responded. "Everyone knows that polls can be rigged for an outcome. For example, did you know that 100% of our union leaders want the NDP to rule BC? Or that 100% of union leaders prefer to sit on the NDP Board of Directors than not? Or 100% of union leaders surveyed do not have a problem supplying "off the books" labour to the NDP during elections? Or that really 87% of the population would vote for the NDP if an election were held today? These are the kind of figures which really matter to the NDP."
These numbers seem quite made up. Since Mustel can be referenced as the source for the figures of the BC Liberals dominating the polls, we asked the Dippers to supply a source for their poll.
Good luck with that.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe when the knives are finished (they are out now)Carole will have to take up poll dancing.
Things do look good for the BC Liberals. They seem to have done everything right.
Campbell is hitting home run after home run.

Monday, May 15, 2006 12:51:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The interesting part of the poll is that Gordon Campbell's support from female voters has gone up significantly. Is this a reflection on Carol James???

Monday, May 15, 2006 1:38:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Carole's face on the body of a CGI stripper? Wow...whomever wrote this post needs help, both in the psychological and comedic sense.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006 12:40:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Poly is doing men a favour. Why? If you're out on a date and you don't want to get to excited, just picture Carole's head on that strippers body. I think the Carole pic might replace having to think about Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.

Thursday, May 18, 2006 10:06:00 AM  

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